Thursday, May 28, 2009

Next Step

On Sunday I graduated! I have decided that I'm not going to school next fall but instead I'm going to work so that I can go back to Africa. I am hoping to go back with a friend when she gets her son from Africa. I will be working at my dad's office this summer but not sure yet where I will work in the fall. I would love to nanny so if ya'll know of anyone needing a nanny let me know.

Saturday, May 2, 2009

Back in America







Its hard to be back. I know that this is not where I am supposed to be so its difficult. Yes I have missed my family and my friends but I dont feel like God is calling me to be here. I spoke to middle school chapel the other day and that went so well. These are some of my thoughts...


Going to Africa I didn’t really have any expectations. That might seem weird because many times before you go on a missions trip you plan out everything that you think will happen. I know that my first mission trip I went on was totally selfish and my expectations were to be blessed from the people there more than I blessed them. So when the Lord told me that He had a plan for me to go to Africa, He also told me this is not about me, it is all about Him and sharing His love. So I didn’t go with any expectations. I went following the Lord and letting Him guide my steps. All I really wanted to do was love these kids as best I could so that they might be able to get a glimpse of what God’s love is like. So while I was there, I hugged and kissed every child I could. I played with the kids even when I was exhausted and didn’t really feel like playing with them. My favorite part of the whole trip was being able to feed the Karamjongs. On Tuesday and Thursday we went down into the village and gathered all of the kids. There were probably about 300-400 kids. We gathered them all at the top of the hill where the school was and would play with them for awhile and then we all came together for a Bible story and worship. After that they would line up and we would feed them rice and bean. They were some of the smallest kids I have ever seen and they were all coming back for 3 or 4 platefuls. To give you an idea, I couldn’t even eat one plateful. But I guess if you are not sure when your next meal will be then you would want to eat as much as you can. Through this, God has really spoken to me about being grateful. It really disgusts me how spoiled my life is with a nice house, nice car, nice private school to go to, and my many other nice belongings. I take them all for granted and many times I am not greateful. In America all of these things seem normal. But reality is that all of these things make us selfish and take our focus away from God, the one who gave all of this to us in the first place. It’s so sad to think about how we take for granted the amount of food we have. I mean even the poorest of poor in America will get at least one meal, if not more, every day. I know that I waste food all the time. It’s heart-breaking because there are so many children in the world that are dying because they don’t get fed and here I am, full so I throw my food away. The Karamjongs were lucky if they got one meal a week before Katie showed up.
The other thing that God really spoke to me about was living in comfort. There are so many people in America who are very comfortable with their lives. They don’t stop and think about how in other parts of the world there are starving people who live on the streets or in little mud huts. The people in America don’t want to feel the guilt of having so much so they just don’t think about it. I have found myself getting too comfortable at home. God has not called us to live a life of comfort though. He has called us to share His love and His word. For some people that might mean sharing in America, but not for me. I would much rather live by faith somewhere where I don’t know where my next meal is coming from than live a life in comfort knowing there will always be food on the table. I think that God wants us to live by faith. Galations 2:20 says, “The life I live in the body I live by faith in the son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me.” By always having what you want, how can you fully live by faith? I find myself getting too comfortable to live fully by faith. I think that to live by faith you have to trust that God will provide for your needs. In America, I feel like I don’t have to rely on Him because I always have what I want. In Uganda, I feel like I rely and trust God more because I am out of my comfort zone. I think that God has called me to live out of my comfort zone and live fully by faith.

“At the end of life we will not be judged by how many diplomas we have received, how much money we have made, how many great things we have done. We will be judged by 'I was hungry and you gave me to eat, I was naked and you clothed me, I was homeless and you took me in.' Hungry not only for bread - but hungry for love. Naked not only for clothing - but naked for human dignity and respect. Homeless not only for want of a room of bricks - but homeless because of rejection.”- Mother Teresa